If you’re planning a wedding, and can’t everyone you’d like, you can probably relate. It’s difficult to tell friends and family they’re not invited to your wedding.  However, here are four things you can do to ease your own discomfort and protect your relationship with family and friends not invited.  

1. Manage expectations from the beginning

When you’re ready to announce that you will be getting married, people will invariably ask “When’s the wedding?” Don’t raise expectations of an invitation. Be prepared to warn family and friends that your wedding invite list will, unfortunately, not be able to include everyone you want. It could be because you and your fiancé have chosen to have a small, intimate wedding, or that with a large family, or parents with numerous business relationships, not as many close family and friends will be invited as you would like.

2. Create your guest list early

Finalize the guest list early in the planning process because the wedding guest list determines who is invited to other wedding-related parties, like an engagement party or shower. Except for a very small wedding, it’s thoughtless to invite family and friends not invited to the wedding, to a wedding shower.

3. Don’t share (and that includes Facebook) your wedding planning progress with friends not invited

Another reason for creating your guest list early is so to avoid talking about your wedding plans with people not invited. There’s nothing worse for a friend to listen to the exciting details of the wedding planning as they unfold and then find out she’s not invited.

If you like to share your wedding planning on Facebook, create a Facebook filter or a Facebook private event so that only friends and family invited will see your posts.

2. Emotionally brace yourself for disappointment and have your 30 second answer

“Try to remember that their disappointment comes from a place of LOVE: they want to be with you on your wedding day, “says offbeatbride.com.”You’re not responsible for their disappointment, nor can you control it — all you can do is try your best to be respectful and kind, and make sure they know that you understand how much they care. But then you’ve got to release it, and get on with your planning.”

Know what your rationale is for your cut off and then prepare your answer to friends and family wondering if they’re invited. Be sure mom, dad, and brothers and sisters are prepared to answer the question the same way.

For example, you may be having a very small wedding with only immediate family, or you come from a very large family where just inviting all your relatives is going to break the bank, or mom and dad are paying for the wedding and want to invite their business associates. Whatever it is, be ready with your answer so you’re not caught off guard. Your answer should be short and then move on to another topic.

4. Do something special after the wedding

After the wedding, you may want to have a one-on-one lunch with close friends not invited to your wedding. Some couples and their families host a less elaborate party or picnic a few weeks after the wedding as a way to introduce the new couple to all family and friends.

If all this seems too much to manage, there’s always Miss Manner’s advice. She advises you to start with making your guest list and then plan your wedding around the number of people you want to invite, including simply having cake and coffee if that’s all you can afford.

A marriage can be a source of great joy and comfort but it can also be a source of great pain and distress.  Happy marriages share common traits as do unhappy marriages.

Researchers could predict with 93% accuracy whether a specific couple was happy or unhappy based on how they answered the following 10 questions.

(In the set of what makes marriages happy, the first percent given is the percent of couples who felt their marriages were happy and the second, the percent who felt their marriages were unhappy. In the second set of what makes unhappy marriages unhappy, the percent is number of unhappy couples who agreed with the statement.)

What Makes Happy Marriages Happy

 1. I am very satisfied with how we talk to each other (90% 15%)

2. We are creative in how we handle our differences (78% 15%)

3. We feel very close to each other (98% 27%)

4. My partner is seldom too controlling (78% 20%)

5. When discussing problems, my partner understands my opinions and ideas (87% 19%)

6. I am completely satisfied with the amount of affection from my partner (72% 28%)

7. We have a good balance of leisure time spent together and separately (71% 17%)

8. My partner’s friends or family rarely interfere with our relationship (81% 38%)

9. We agree on how to spend money (89% 41%)

10. I am satisfied with how we express spiritual values and beliefs (89% 36%)

What Makes Unhappy Marriages Unhappy

 1. We have problems sharing leadership equally (93%)

2. My partner is sometimes too stubborn (87%)

3. Having children reduces our marital satisfaction (84%)

4. My partner is too negative or critical  (83%)

5. I wish my partner had more time and energy for recreation with me (82%)

6. I wish my partner were more willing to share feelings (82%)

7. I always end up feeling responsible for the problem (81%)

8. I go out of my way to avoid conflict with my partner (79%)

9. We have difficulty completing tasks or projects (79%)

10. Our differences never seem to get resolved (78%)

Amazon’s Top Selling Books on Marriage

The Five Love Languages: The Secret to Love that Lasts

Gary Chapman

4.6 out of 5 stars   (364)

Kindle Edition

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The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love That Lasts

by Gary D. Chapman

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Paperback

List Price: $14.99

Price: $8.99

The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work: A Practical Guide from the Country’s Foremost Relationship Expert

List Price: $15.00

Price: $10.20

Love & Respect: The Love She Most Desires; The Respect He Desperately Needs

by Emerson Eggerichs

4.3 out of 5 stars   (639)

Hardcover

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The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work

John Gottman, Nan Silver

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Hold Me Tight: Seven Conversations for a Lifetime of Love

by Sue Johnson

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The 5 Love Languages Men’s Edition: The Secret to Love That Lasts

by Gary D. Chapman

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His Needs, Her Needs: Building an Affair-Proof Marriage

by Willard F. Jr. Harley

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Love & Respect: The Love She Most Desires; The Respect He Desperately Needs (Focus on the Family)

Emerson Eggerichs

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Science Camp, Worcester, MA

Yes. Your son or daughter could lose weeks, if not, months of learning without some type of educational activity during summer break.

Decades of research confirm that summer learning loss is real according to an article in the New York Times. This learning loss is cumulative, summer after summer. “It has a tremendous impact on students’ success, including high school completion, post-secondary education and work- force preparedness,” said the article.

Fortunately, summer school is no longer boring drills solely for kids who need remedial help. It’s for all levels. Summer learning programs are now offered by not only local school systems but libraries, parks and recreation departments, and other local organizations. For example, Pittsburgh offers full-day summer camps for all their elementary and middle school students that incorporate academics along with enrichment activities like judo and rowing. The Fairfax County elementary school in Virginia offers a Little Authors Workshop and We Do Robotics.

Besides local organizations, there are also national educational camping associations that offer, for example, science and math camps – and they’re fun.

To find a good summer academic program for your child in your area, contact your school, local colleges, library, and parks and recreation department as well as relevant local attractions, such as a nearby zoo.

You can also find programs online. There are sites that list general academic summer programs like Summer School Review, Summercamp.com, and American Camp Association. However, the best way to find the right class or camp is to do a search by subject; for example, “math camps”, “science camps”, etc. Some local meet up organizations offer classes for kids as well.  And don’t forget there may be fun apps appropriate for your child’s learning level, such as math apps for elementary grades and junior high and high school grades.

Photos: Worcester Academy, Walmart.com

Essentials for a Healthy Baby

Baby Thermometer

Baby’s fussy, mom’s not sure what’s happening – having a baby thermometer handy, even if it’s just to rule out a fever, can bring peace of mind to any new mom.

Infant Tylenol

Many first-time moms don’t think of buying Infant Tylenol and more experienced moms may have only Children’s Tylenol handy or her infant Tylenol may have expired. When baby has a fever, needs to stay indoors, and no one is around to run to the store, it’s worrying to have to wait until someone can.

Nasal aspirator

Also known as snot suckers, every baby at some point is going to have a stuffed up nose that needs relief. A cool mist humidifier is also important to have to help baby breathe easier.

Baby Sun Block

Most new moms know to keep a baby out of the sun but when there just isn’t enough shade or protection, it’s helpful to have a tube of baby sun block specifically formulated for a baby’s sensitive skin.

Pacifiers

New parents can never have too many pacifiers, especially for those times when they’re fumbling around in the dark with a screaming baby whose pacifier has fallen on the floor or is stuck somewhere under the mattress.

Baby Nail Clippers

It’s heartbreaking to see scratches on a newborn’s face caused by his or her long fingernails. Every new mom needs baby nail clippers handy.

Hooter Hiders and Other Nursing Aids

Nursing Covers

Nursing covers like Hooter Hider and BeBe Au Lait make great gifts, especially if they include a package of nursing pads.

For When You Know What Gets Sore

“I give new moms nipple cream,” said one new mom. “Breast feeding was so hard on me.  It was nice to have something that made me feel better.  I liked Gerber Breast Therapy Gentle moisturizing balm.” Other mom’s favorites are Motherlove Nipple Cream  and Gerber Relief Packs.

For When What Goes In Must Come Out

Old-Fashioned Cloth Diaper Burp Cloths

During a baby’s first year, there are never enough burp cloths. Most new parents get plenty of cute burp cloths in pretty colors and fun designs but most of these cloths don’t absorb. How much does cute count when your baby’s spit is rolling down your burp cloth and onto you? Old-fashioned cloth diapers make the best burp cloths. They absorb and tend to get softer with each washing.

Scented Diaper Disposal Bags

“When I first got scented diaper disposal bags, I thought, ‘You have got to be kidding me’ but I used them and had to buy more!  It made sense when we were out, like in a restaurant, and I needed to stick that poopy diaper back in the diaper bag until we got home.”

Kirkland Baby Wipes
“Kirkland are BY FAR the best wipes,” said a new mom. Good price and they do the job like no other.” And Aquafor is great for a diaper rash.

Baby wash cloths

Most new moms, especially as baby grows, are surprised by the number of baby washcloths they use.

Gentle Baby Detergent

A baby’s skin is too sensitive for the typical family detergent. Often it’s after the new mom and baby are home, that the reality of all that wash sinks in. It helps for the new mom to have a bottle of gentle baby detergent handy.

Books about Baby and Books for Mom

There are the inevitable books for any new parents about their pregnancy and what to expect the first year but later parents find they need more specialized books. Here are some popular books:

Make Your Own Baby Food Cookbooks

Like most, new moms are concerned about pesticides, additives and just what’s in the food we’re eating. So more moms are making their own baby food and there are many wonderful baby food cookbooks available to help them do it.

Baby Sleep Books

After three straight days of being up with a baby who won’t sleep, mom and dad realize something’s got to change. There’s usually plenty of free advice from other moms and grandma about what to do when baby won’t sleep. For these times, it’s helpful and comforting to have the straight scoop from professionals who have researched sleep in infants and babies. Here are a few popular books:

Secrets of the Baby Whisperer: How to Calm, Connect and Communicate with Your Baby – A best seller written by Tracy Hogg, an English nurse and founder of Baby Technique, a Los Angeles-based newborn and lactation consulting firm, offers a way of calming and caring for babies that led one of her clients to dub her “the baby whisperer.” In this, her first book, she teaches parents how to decipher “infants’ language “their cries, gestures, and facial expressions.

The Baby Sleep Book: The Complete Guide for a Good Night’s Rest for the Whole Family by William Sears, M.D., a pediatrician, and his wife, Martha Sears, a registered nurse, childbirth educator, and breastfeeding consultant. The Sears have eight children.

The No-Cry Sleep Solution: Gentle Ways of Helping Your Baby Sleep Through the Night by Elizabeth Pentley who offers a solution that falls between letting the baby cry it out to getting up every time the baby cries.

Health Sleep Habits, Healthy Child by Marc Weissbluth, MD a pediatrician and father of four.

Books for Mom

Many moms appreciate getting books just for them – not books about baby but books they can read when they find time to relax or while nursing or pumping. Here are some fiction best sellers and non-fiction best sellers, and if you’re not sure, a gift card is helpful.

Clothing and Accessories

One of the most fun shower gifts to buy is baby clothing. It’s a delight to browse through the baby department surrounded by all those adorable outfits. However, moms’ favorite clothing items tend to be onesies and sleepers that snap up the front to make diaper changes easy. A baby may go through several outfits in one day. And Swaddle sacks are popular for keeping baby warm and secure.

In terms of baby accessories, one mom said her Fisher Price Rock n Play Newborn Sleeper was “awesome for her reflux baby” and another liked Sleepy Sheep for getting baby to sleep. And one last popular accessory is always the baby sling.

While any of these gifts would be appreciated by any new mom, a guaranteed favorite is a gift card for a massage or pedicure – one with no expiration date as it may be a while before she’s in a position to use it.

If you wear a white coat that you believe belongs to a doctor, your ability to pay attention increases sharply. But if you wear the same white coat believing it belongs to a painter, you will show no such improvement according to a scientific study reported in the New York Times.

So  it’s not just what’s inside that counts. What we wear and other symbols we don can make a difference. If you hold a hot drink in your hand, you will be seen as warmer than someone holding an iced drink. If you carry a heavy clipboard, you will feel more important. Women who dress in a masculine fashion during a job interview are more likely to be hired, and a teaching assistant who wears formal clothes is perceived as more intelligent than one who dresses more casually.

Go figure. To read the full article, see the New York Times.

There are, however, steps you can take to protect your phone or iPad. Here are four:

1. Protect Your iPhone’s or IPad’s Hardware

If your little one wants to see what happens when the iPhone is dropped into his bath, you and your phone are sunk. However, there are several products to protect your iPhone’s screen from jam, drools and other fun stuff; or if he decides to hurl it onto the floor.  I’ve listed many of these items at the end of this post.

2. Protect Your Apps from Accidental Deletions

Have you ever gone to use one of your favorite apps, after you’ve let a child play with your phone, only for it nowhere to be found? Chances are he deleted it; it’s so easy to do. You can prevent this from happening:

a. Go to Settings
b. Hit General
c. Scroll down and hit Restrictions
d. Hit Enable Restrictions
e. Set a password code
f. Scroll down to “Deleting Apps” and hit “On”

3. Protect Your Credit Card from In-App Purchases

Last year, an 8-year old racked up $1400 on her parents’ credit card buying Smurfberries, an in-app purchase, for the game Smurfs’ Village. According to the article in the Washington Post, in-app purchases have catapulted children’s games such as Smurfs’ Village and Tap Zoo into the ranks of the highest-grossing apps on iPods, iPhones and iPads.

You can prevent kids from making these in-app purchases:

a. Go to Settings
b. Hit General
c. Scroll down and hit Restrictions
d. Hit Enable Restrictions
e. Set a password code
f. Scroll down to “Installing Apps” and hit “On”

4.  Prevent Your Child from Wandering to Your Other Apps

It’s easy for anyone using your phone to wander into your other apps. The best thing to do is to download a few children’s apps appropriate for your child’s age and then put them all on one page. Most kids who do drift into non-kid apps usually do so by mistake.

If you want to ensure your child just stays on one app, you can purchase a bub cap which prevents anyone from hitting the home button. There are three models available: regular, ultra and max. The difference is the thickness; regular is pretty easy to press while max is very difficult — even for an adult. The problem with bub cap, however, is if you have more than one child’s app on your phone, he or she won’t be able to move between the apps without you hitting the home button.

Products That Protect Your iPhone or iPad from Kids

iPad 2 iGuy $26.98 (plus $6.63 for shipping)

Free-standing iPad case with foam protection and kid-friendly handles

4 out of 5 stars (26 reviews)

Fits iPad 1 and iPad2

Fisher-Price iPhone Case – $17.95

• Durable case; easy-grasp handles sized for baby
• Protects  device from baby’s dribbles & drool
• For iPhone, iPhone 3G, 3GS,  4, iPod touch 2nd
• 4 out of 5 stars (109 reviews)

 Fisher-Price iPad Case $54.95 ($11.99 for shipping)

• Place the device into the case, twist the locks, then your device is protected
• Offers three ways to play: roly-poly based, easel, or place
• Compatible with iPad 1 or iPad 2

OtterBox Defender Case for iPhone $16.99

• Screen membrane eliminates static, bubbles and oil slick appearance
• Inner felt liner cushions device .
• Textured silicone exterior for improved grip
• Includes holster which doubles as a stand for hands-free media viewing.
• 4 of 5 stars (1,803 reviews)

Otterbox for iPad 2 $46.99

• Easy snap-off access for docking
• Snap-On touch screen shield doubles as a viewing and typing stand
• Single layer dual density material
• 4 of 5 stars (155 reviews)

Woogie 2!, iPhone Case $19.98

• Huggable case protects iPhone or iPod touch
• Five-legged case lets kids watch video, play games, listen to music, and more
• iPhone or iPod is protected by a see-through pocket and velcro closure integrated within the soft plush toy
• 4 of 5 stars (3 ratings)

Disney Hard Case Cover for Iphone $4.99 ($4.54 shipping)

4 of 5 stars (40 reviews)

PhoneDevil / MediaDevil  screen protector $11.97

• Easy to apply: no cutting required. Invisible once applied to the screen
• Bonds firmly to screen; easily removed and re-applied
• Protects against scratches, and leaves no markings when removed
• Also available in Matte Clear (Anti-Glare) and Privacy editions
• 4 of 5 stars (216 reviews)

Kidz Gear Wired Headphones For Kids $19.99

• 100% Satisfaction Guaranteed – Lifetime Limited Warranty
• Custom designed fit for children 2 yrs. and older – Light weight and comfortable
• Built-in volume control knob to adjust the volume range within the selected volume limits
• 4.5 stars (316 reviews)

(Photos: Jennycu, toastforbrekkie)

The technique, called spaced repetition learning, is particularly effective when trying to learn and retain a large body of knowledge; for example, a new language, or studying a discipline that includes many unfamiliar or foreign terms such as medicine, science, math, geography, etc.

Spaced repetition learning uses increasing intervals of time between reviewing the material you are trying to learn. For example, after you’ve first been presented a set of terms, a few days later, and then a few weeks later, test yourself on the same terms. Having this interval has been shown to be much more effective than trying to memorize a specific set of terms in one sitting.

For more information on spaced repetition learning, see this Time magazine article.

If you are interested in using spaced repetition learning to help your child or yourself, the article includes a paragraph at the end that advises sending yourself emails, timed at different intervals, with review questions for whatever topic you’re trying to learn. However, there’s a much easier way. If you have an iPhone or iPad, you can download the iPhone App  called Cramberry (free/$3.99). If you don’t have a smartphone, you can work directly on their site, cramberry.net

Cramberry uses flash cards with the spaced repetition method to help you learn a set of concepts. You can create your own flashcards or choose from hundreds of sets of flash cards created by other Cramberry users. Some of the topics include; for example, history, Spanish vocabulary, Latin, physics, and addition.

When you use a Cramberry flashcard set, the terms you are trying to learn pop up one at a time, which you then answer. You then tap a bar to see if your answer is correct. If you knew the answer, you hit a “correct” button; if you didn’t, you hit “incorrect”. The words will then present themselves again in the future at intervals using the spaced repetition method.

Most of us survived college finals by cramming. The spaced repetition learning method not only presents a saner way of studying, it can increase retention by as much as 50%. Now how great is that?

Photos: Public Relations

Letter to a Big Brother

Baby Monkey,

Soon, very soon, our family of three will become four.

And you will be a big brother.

You know that—we’ve talked about it a lot.

You’re excited that the time is near, eager to welcome the baby to our family.

But you don’t really understand what it means.

You will, though, because your life is going to change, forever.

When you are grown up, you won’t remember these past two and half years.

You won’t know how we spent our time, how we played together every day.  How we talked about nothing and everything. How we read your stories for hours on end.

How you told me I was your best friend.

How, every morning, you asked me, “What are we going to do today?” because you knew we had an adventure planned for the day. Sometimes with our friends, sometimes alone.  But always an adventure.

Always together.

And now, our days will involve someone else.

Our time will be different.

Your life, our lives, will be fuller and richer for that change.

You are being given a wonderful gift, my son.

A friend, perhaps the closest you will ever have.

The person most likely to understand your perspective on life and family.

Someone who will be there for your highest and lowest moments.

A partner for your adventures through life.

I’m sure we’ll face challenges as we adjust—every family does.

But soon it won’t be long before you don’t remember what it was like before your sibling was born.

Trust me. I know.

From one older sibling to another, I have some thoughts for you.

Treasure your brother or sister. Love him or her.

Enjoy your time together. When you are young, it seems never-ending. But really, I promise, it is very short.

Don’t worry about whom your parents love more. We love you both, completely. Differently and the same. You’ll understand one day.

Respect your differences—they make you each unique.

Laugh with each other. That intersection of laughter and love is what makes life worth living.

Little one, I’m so proud of you.

Every day, I’m overwhelmed by your heart and your soul and your smile. I’m grateful that you are in my life, that we have this time together.

Congratulations, my baby.

I know you will be an amazing big brother.

Photo: Tanya Little

Calling off a wedding can be a gut wrenching decision – the disappointment, the money, all the questions, the loss of a dream… It’s why so many don’t do it when they should. Authors of How Not to Marry the Wrong Guy, Anne Milford and Jennifer Gauvain, say that among the divorced women they worked with, 30% knew they were making a mistake when they walked down the aisle.

“I remember standing in my bedroom telling my bridesmaid that I didn’t want to get married. This was right before the ceremony and the guests were sitting, ready for the affair to begin. I chalked it up to cold feet plus I didn’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings, so I went through with it, “said Ruth in an online wedding forum.” It was the biggest mistake of my life. I was married for almost four years and I have been divorced for twenty one years. There is no worse feeling than feeling all alone when there is another person in the house/bed. I will never again do anything that I don’t want to do just so I don’t hurt someone else’s feelings.”

Some, like Jennifer Wilbanks of Georgia, are so afraid to call it off they run away instead.  Jennifer made national news when she set off a huge search-and-rescue by disappearing days before her wedding day, pretending to have been kidnapped.

If you are planning a wedding and wondering if getting married is the right decision, below is advice from others who had similar doubts.

Listen to Your Gut

It’s not only common to be nervous before making any major commitment, it’s actually a good thing as it reinforces you know the seriousness of what you are about to do. However, if you have a nagging feeling that something is just not right, it’s more than cold feet.

Listen to your gut. Gut feeling should be taken seriously. There are numerous recorded examples, according to the British Journal of Psychology, where relying on intuition prevented catastrophes or resulted in remarkable recoveries. Researchers have concluded that intuition – a feeling that something is right or wrong – is the brain drawing on past experiences and current external cues to make a decision.

There doesn’t have to be something wrong with your fiancé to call it off. “I knew deep down that he wasn’t the one, but I had no reason to end it because he treated me like gold,” said a fitness manager to the New York Times.

“I had no ‘smoking gun’,'” said Rachel Safir who called off her wedding and wrote about it in a book,There Goes the Bride: Making Up Your Mind, Calling It Off & Moving On, “There was no third party, no abuse, just this deep knowledge that I was doing the wrong thing. It’s hard to listen to that when people want you to get married.”

If you’re one who’s not always in touch with your feelings, pay attention to other signs your body may be telling you. A good friend of mine had the hiccups for three days before his ill-fated marriage. After his divorce, he said he knew at the time it didn’t feel right to get married but went ahead despite his misgivings.

Talk About Your Fears

Talk to a therapist. A good therapist should be able to help you know whether it’s something serious or just pre-wedding jitters. For others, it may help to talk with your minister.

One question is if you should talk to your fiancé. Some say no, he or she will only try to talk you out of it. Others like Daniel J. Tomasulo, a  licensed psychologist, suggest you “Carve out some serious time, perhaps a full day, or at least several hours, for the two of you to be completely alone, with the purpose of discussing the viability of moving forward.”

Get Support

“Planning a lavish wedding is somewhat like being aboard a fast train with no brakes. It’s hard to jump off,” said Rachel Safir.

So line up your support when you know you’re going to jump off. For some, if you’re lucky, this may be a parent.  ” My mom tells the story that right before she walked down the aisle, my grandfather told her, ‘It’s not too late to change your mind,’ wrote Kathryn. “He wasn’t joking or dogging my dad, but he wanted her to know it was ok to say no even if it was at the last minute.

A friend of mine said her mother gave $10,000 each to her and her sister before they got married in case they ever needed to get out – a reassuring signal that they had her support no matter what. Both are still married.

Some parents and friends just don’t want to believe it’s anything but pre-wedding jitters. “I started having second thoughts because something did not seem right. I voiced my concerns to my mother who thought I was joking and did not take me seriously. I also told my cousin just days before the wedding that I didn’t think I wanted to get married, but he too offered no solutions,” wrote another woman in the online forum. “So I went through with the wedding, honeymoon and then the divorce. Although we were officially married for just over three years, our relationship started a steep decline shortly after our first anniversary and we lived apart for the last year. While telling my family and friends that I was getting divorced was very difficult, I would have preferred to have three very unhappy years of my life back.”

Other parents get too invested in the wedding.”I didn’t feel I could talk about what I was feeling because people were hurting,” said another. “My mom told me: ‘Why do you feel bad? You’re the one who did this, “said the fitness manager.  Another wrote her mother didn’t talk to her for three months after she called off the wedding.

If you can’t count on your parents to support you, find someone who will. It may be a good friend or other relative.  “It was actually my sister who had suggested that if I felt really torn that I should take the ring off and see how I felt. She was absolutely correct with her suggestion, because as soon as I took the ring off I felt a sense of relief and I knew I was doing the right thing by calling off the wedding,” wrote Ruby.

Don’t discount online support. “For some, there is something very healing about furiously typing your feelings and getting back this avalanche of support and love from people who don’t love you unconditionally, who don’t know you. I posted a lot on The Knot when I had cold feet and many of the women I interviewed said that they didn’t discuss their cold feet with friends because they didn’t want them to think poorly of their fiancés – especially if they did stay in the relationships. Anonymity is helpful, “said Rachel to Indie Bride.

“When we called it off, all these women wrote to me saying that they had called off their weddings, and that they had gotten through it. I had this wonderful community. It wasn’t so much that I chose to speak to them instead of my friends. It was that my friends didn’t have that experience. One power of the Internet is that you can find the community you need when you don’t necessarily have it around you,” said Rachel.

Consider Postponing the Wedding

If you’re not sure whether you want to call off the wedding, postpone it.

“When I told my fiancée that I wanted to call off the wedding, he was wonderfully understanding. He only asked that I go with him to pre-marital counseling before officially calling it off.  The counselor took a huge amount of stress off me by telling me that I could simply postpone the wedding for as long as I needed to while I worked through my doubts. My fiancée agreed, telling me that I was worth waiting for.  Now, after 20 happy years of marriage, I am very glad he waited!” wrote Linda from Tulsa, Oklahoma.

Prepare for the Practical Aspects of Calling Off Your Wedding

If you think you may be calling off the wedding, make a list of the people you need to contact and how you are going to do it.

Wedding etiquette experts advise you to tell your fiancé in person, return the ring, and not to play it out on Twitter or Facebook. Prepare a statement for notifying guests as to why you are cancelling. You don’t have to give all the details when telling invitees the wedding is cancelled.

Return any gifts you’ve been sent and cancel your gift registries. Contact your vendors as soon as possible. Depending on how far in advance you cancel your wedding, you may be able to recover some of your costs.

If you’re engaged and having serious doubts, it may help to remember that Anne Milford, author of How Not To Marry the Wrong Guy, says she never met a bride who cancelled her wedding who regretted her decision but has met many who didn’t and wished they had.

(Photos: Leah Makin Photography, oriolsalvador)

The purpose of Read Across America Day is to encourage every single child to celebrate reading on March 2,  Dr. Seuss’s birthday.

In cities and towns across the nation, teachers, teenagers, librarians, politicians, actors, athletes, parents, grandparents, and others are celebrating today by helping to bring reading excitement to the children in their communities. Locally, everyone-from schools to libraries to community centers to churches to hospitals to bookstores-is invited to host local events to celebrate and promote children’s reading. To see what’s going on in your state, click here.

Today, March 2, is Read Across America Day, sponsored by the National Education Association.

The purpose of Read Across America Day is to encourage every single child to celebrate reading on March 2, Dr. Seuss’s birthday.

In cities and towns across the nation, teachers, teenagers, librarians, politicians, actors, athletes, parents, grandparents, and others are celebrating today by helping to bring reading excitement to the children in their communities. Locally, everyone-from schools to libraries to community centers to churches to hospitals to bookstores-is invited to host local events to celebrate and promote children’s reading. To see what’s going on in your state, click here.

Popular Dr. Seuss Books on Amazon

The Lorax (Classic Seuss) [Hardcover]

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The Lorax Pop-Up! [Hardcover]

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Dr. Seuss’s Beginner Book Collection (Cat in the Hat, One Fish Two Fish, Green Eggs and Ham, Hop on Pop, Fox in Socks) [Box set] [Hardcover]

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Your Favorite Seuss: A Baker’s Dozen by the One and Only Dr. Seuss [Hardcover]

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Green Eggs and Ham (I Can Read It All by Myself Beginner Books) [Hardcover]

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Dr. Seuss’s ABC: An Amazing Alphabet Book! [Board book]

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The Cat in the Hat [Hardcover]

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Other Popular Dr. Seuss Books on Amazon